10 Things That Didn't Make It To My CV
Nobody likes writing a CV, heck nobody is really 100% sure what we should and shouldn't be including, how formal it should be, should we be including hobbies, how long it should be.....the list is endless and we all bumble our way through and god knows how but sometimes we get jobs despite them.
With that in mind, here's a few things I left off my CV....
1. Instagram Obsessive. As much as I'd like to claim it is 'extensive experience in a social media role', let's be honest here, it's just spending 284790273598 hours scrolling and creating the perfect grid'.
2. Reality TV Expert. Basically I can name all of the Kardashian/Jenner clan including all the half brothers & sisters/spouses/ex spouses/deceased and the children. Pretty impressive I think you'll agree.
3. Bargain Hunter. I can navigate Primark in Cardiff City centre on a match day Saturday lunchtime and come out with 35 items for £25.00 and all my limbs attached.
4. Hobbies Include Running. I have run before. Maybe 10 times. A few years ago.
5. Excessive Childcare Experience. I have a niece, I babysit twice a week, she doesn't always cry, she frequently even laughs in my company. She has been known to put me through the nappy explosion from hell. It's a work in progress.
6. Culinary Wizard. I can make a mean pasta with cheese.
7. Extra Curricular Activities Include... Sleeping. Facebook. Bad TV. Sleeping. Eating. Snacking. Sleeping. Shopping. Shopping when I have no money. Sleeping. Texting. Snapchat. Eating. Sleeping. You get the idea.
8. Master Gamer. I frequent all forms of King games including Candy Crush, CandyCrush Jelly, Candy Crush Soda Saga, Pet Rescue and Farm Heroes Saga. I am even past Level 100 on some of them. Yup.
9. Experience In Motor Racing. I passed my driving test at the age of 23 and have been driving less than two months. I frequently score 99 on my DrivePlus box and I am almost certain it makes me the best driver there has ever been.
10. Competent At Mathematics. I got a C at GCSE and I once made 1 x 100 = 1000.
I'm pretty sure you'll agree I am the PERFECT candidate for any job. Employers line up, gurl is free for work.