20 Things You Learn Driving Early In The Morning
I might not have been driving long but the majority of the driving I have done has been between the hours of 6 and 8am.
1. Radio One breakfast show is shite if Grimmy is away. Unless it's Scott Mills covering but then your afternoons are ruined in his absence.
2. People do not like to do 30 miles an hour at 6am. Especially in a 30 zone.
3. You cannot see SHIT when you have any form of headlight coming toward you.
4. Anti dazzle mirrors do NOTHING. Nada.
5. Once it gets going the sun rises very quickly. Like in 15 minutes.
6. The steering wheel will be VERY cold when you get in the car.
7. You will inevitably forget your gloves to deal with the steering wheel and have frostbite for the rest of the week.
8. Lots of birds attack lots of small rodents early in the morning.
9. You will not leave enough time to de mist or de frost your car and you will have to make do with wiping a fraction away and then driving with your nose 2 inches from the windscreen for the first 5 minutes.
10. You will either see no other cars or you will be stuck in a queue. THERE IS NO IN BETWEEN.
11. You will have forsaken your breakfast for an extra few minutes in bed and you will be starving and the car provides no snacks.
12. You will vow to bring snacks for tomorrow's journey to stash permanently in the car.
13. You will forget the snacks again.
14. Every button, switch, light, heater, blower and de mister will be on. You are not 100% sure what some of them are doing only that you MUST have them on.
15. Why does anyone drive in the daytime anyway? Seeing headlights make driving through lanes/turning out of junctions/reversing so much easier.
16. OH GOD IT'S DARK AND RAINING THIS IS A NIGHTMARE WHY WOULD ANYONE DRIVE IN THE MORNING I AM BLIND I REPEAT BLIND.
17. You don't always have to do your hair and makeup and dress like a real human because really, who else is up at this hour to see you?
18. But oh god what if you have an accident or break down and have to stand on the side of a dual carriage way in your makeupless in your trackies and uggs.
19. Maybe you should just put some mascara on just in case.
20. This is just plain ridiculous, why am I even up at this hour. Nothing is this important.