Bragging. It really isn't a British thing to do. We scorn at confident people, we shy away from celebrating our successes, we find it socially awkward to discuss our achievements - it just isn't the done thing.
But why not? American people are the essence of confident people. Stereotypically loud go getters they have absolutely no problem with shouting about the good things they've done - I mean, have you seen the Kardashians on social media?
I think it's about time to challenge the British stereotype, to stand up and scream from the rooftops just how great you are (ok that's taking it a bit far, British people don't like public declarations). Here's why and how you can start bragging about yourself without sounding like a twat.
Why We Need To Get Over Bragging About Yourself:
Firstly why do we find it so hard to brag about our achievements and successes? If we've done something good shouldn't we want to tell people about it? 9 times out of 10 the things we have been successful in are things that might impact or help other people.
I always share my blog stats and my landmarks on Twitter not because I'm bragging about what a success I am making but more because I find it helpful when other people do too. I like to know the stats of other bloggers so I can see roughly who I am on a par with. It makes me feel more successful to know I am hitting the same type of goals as bloggers I admire so I share mine for the same reason.
If you're good at something and you've succeeded why not share it? It isn't bragging, it's letting people know how you're getting on, what you're up to and the people most likely to respond to you are the people genuinely pleased for your successes who'll congratulate you. And the people who don't like it? There's such thing as unfollow.
There comes a point in life I think that you can be too self deprecating, too 'oh no honestly it's not that good' etc and it just becomes annoying. You know those people in school who'd say "no I didn't do THAT well" for A Levels and then they got 4 A*? This is what I think you need to avoid. Self deprecation is great, it's humbling, it's a natural reaction but when you KNOW you've done good and everyone else knows it too? Sometimes it's better to just say thank you and own it.
When I was in university it became a running joke that my classmates wouldn't ask me about what work I had done over the weekend or what I had to hand in for assessments because I'd say 'oh only a little bit' and then turn up with 40 files. I didn't do it intentionally but once it became a joke I just owned it and took the crown of class swot willingly. And I got a 2:1 so I didn't do too badly.
It's ok to just own it, to say thank you for a compliment, to accept it when someone comments on your achievement, to be humble without being falsely self deprecating.
You can brag without being cocky, being humble is an under rated trait in a human being. You don't need to be in your face with your achievements, you can shout about it quietly, you can be humble and still be successful.
How To Get Over Bragging About Yourself:
- Accept it's good for you. It is good for our mental health to think about our achievements and what we're good at especially when we are so used to dragging ourselves down. We constantly pick faults, find flaws and tear ourselves down and bragging about the things you DO like is good for your wellbeing.
- It doesn't make you look up yourself. I literally can't think of a time I've seen someone on Twitter or Facebook talking about something good they've done and thought 'what an arse hole'. How many graduation selfies and university degree statuses have you seen on social media the past few weeks as everyone finishes? If you're not happy or think 'naw how nice' for every single one then idk.
- We're in the business. If you read my blog 90% chance you're a blogger yourself - that's just the audience I attract so hey to you all. At the end of the day we're in the business of bragging. We all write blogs, most of which are lifestyle in some way and that means they're about us and our lives. We never talk about how self indulgent that makes us? To talk to strangers on the internet about our lives but just think if you're worried about celebrating a success on social media - you're likely to share it on your blog anyway.
- We have to promote ourselves. Same thing really, we are bloggers, our success and our promotion is 100% down to us. If we don't put the effort in, our little corners of the internet probably won't be read, we won't monetise it and we probably won't get some of the opportunities we have without it. One way of promoting us and our brands is to share all the great things we've done and just shout about it. If you want to attract brands you have to share all your stats and successes so why don't we do it with other bloggers?
At the end of the day, we are in the business of bragging and I think the sooner we accept that and celebrate each other's achievements the better.